Reality number 1: girls don't want/desperately pursue nice guys.
It doesn't happen... argue all you want about it... it's a fact of
life. Girls make a tradition about how nice the nice guys are... but
how many assholes vs nice guys have they been 'sexually involved w'...
that ratio... should make all you flower holders die a little on the
inside.
Nice guys? what are you doing wrong? You're giving the girl everything
she thinks she 'needs' and still she's leaving you for the badass who
treats her poorly, gets off and goes to sleep...
One of the ironies of life i have discovered relatively lately is girls
are drawn towards guys with "direction." Women love to see a guy with a
blooming future that they can be a part of and dream about. The girl
doesn't want to be priority number one. In fact, it's probably best
that she wasn't even priority number 2 or 3. Think about that for a
second... she wants to be in the picture.. but not the main focus.
So where does the irony come in? Whats the whole holy grail to guy +
girl relationships? love. What does love do? wreck your goals. "No,
no justin, it doesn't do that! it makes you stronger!!" Well.. if love
makes it so you're selfless to the other person meaning you care more
about them than you do yourself... that kinda bumps the life focus
priorities down a few notches doesn't it? So... in essence... the girls
are attracted to guys going through life like a solid train on the
tracks... so they can derail them... and they're not interested in guys
that want to chase girls.. like trains that are already derailed and
looking to get back on track.
Still wondering what the jerk has over the nice guy? Two things:
1. Assertiveness. A jerk is willing to kick the girl out of his room if he wants to be by himself, or in the morning if he wants to eat breakfast by himself. (While I'm not recommending you do either of those), I suggest you draw a line somewhere, unless you're running for some contest as "Best walking doormat."
2. Recently I learned we (as humans) are more willing to 'settle' for someone less attractive if our ego/confidence is temporarily bruised. What do you think the effect of occasionally jackass jokes are?
You Only Get What You Don't Need.
(Guys sometimes relationships can be related to war,
it's psychological warfare. Either you weaken her defenses or your
offense has to be that much stronger. Many times girls will be like
the 3 year old that says "No" to any guy that walks up to them... and wait to see who's still around at the end of it. It's
the guy that ignores this and makes her smile and make her reconsider
whether he's worth her time that gets her number.)